Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The Next Survivor Series

Six married men will be dropped on and island with one car and three kids each for a six weeks.

Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes....there will be no fast food.

Each man must take care of his three kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, and complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money.

In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week. Each man must remember the birthday of their friends and relatives and send cards out on time...no emailing!!

Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut. He must also make one unscheduled trip to the school with a forgotten lunch or homework assignment.

He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function...They must also be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keeping presentable at all times.

The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn himself with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished and eyebrows groomed.

During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, and have extreme unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other activities.

They must attend weekly school meetings, church and find time at least once a week to spend the afternoon at the park or a similiar setting. They will need to read a book each night to the kids, feed them, dress them, and brush their teeth.

A test will be given at the end of the six weeks and each father must know all of the following:
Each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size, and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth and length of labor. Each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear, and what they want to be when they grow up.

The kids vote them off of the island based on performance. The last man wins only if ...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moments notice!!!

If the last man does win, he can play again and again for the next 18-25 years eventually earning the right to be called Mother!!!!

1 comment: